So yesterday I fell out of the shower ... literally fell out of the shower. First time in 43 years. From shower to floor, the whole debacle probably took all but 2 seconds, but it's truly amazing the number of thoughts that can run through one's mind in two seconds. Here is a brief glimpse of what I was thinking while falling out of the shower:
- Whoa, that's slippery.
- Oh, man. I think I'm falling out of the shower.
- The toilet is right there. What if I hit my head on it.
- What if I literally fall in the toilet?
- Did I flush?
- If I didn't flush, I'm going to have to shower again.
- I'm never going to live this down.
- If I'm knocked out, please Carol, put clothes on me before the ambulance arrives.
- I thought this only happened to elderly people.
- So, this is how people break hips.
- If I die, I was really hoping to go out another way.
- I may just have to say to Carol, "I've fallen and I can't get up."
- I don't think I hit my head on the toilet.
- What if the shower rod falls on my face?
- How will I explain any injuries?
- I'm on the floor.
- Ouch, that kind of hurt.
- I think I'm OK.
- I can't believe I just fell out of the shower.
The processing speed of the brain truly is amazing and I'm curious as to where this processing ability was when I was taking math classes. I certainly didn't seem to have it then. Maybe I should have fallen out of my seat more in class.
Anyway, a large percentage of accidents occur while falling in the bathroom, so if you've ever fallen in the shower, don't feel bad. You're not alone. Clumsy people ... UNITE!