Monday, March 31, 2014

Insecurity ...

I had a Holy Spirit punch to the gut today when I was reading Psalm 139.  I came to verses 13 and 14 which read: "(13) For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb.  (14) I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

The "punch" came when I asked myself this question:  When is the last time I actually praised God for how He has made me?  If I'm honest, I don't think I ever have.  I have looked up at the stars in the middle of the night and praised God for making them.  I have stood at the Grand Canyon and literally knelt down and praised God for it.  I have walked through Yellowstone National Park and the mountains of Alaska and praised God for His creation.  I have hiked through the Narrows in Zion National Park and was overwhelmed with the beauty of what He has made.  But, never once have I ever praised God for making me the way He has made me.  I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I'm probably not the only one.  

I'm really good at praising God for how He has made others.  It's really easy for me to look at someone else and say they are "fearfully and wonderfully made."  But, it's also really easy for me to start comparing myself to those same people believing that they are more ... well ... made than I am.  I doubt this is what God has in mind when He gave us Psalm 139.   Comparisons will always lead to insecurity.  The more I compare, the more insecure I feel.  I have a feeling this is probably what the enemy wants ... to keep us so occupied with who we are NOT that we forget who we ARE and, probably even more importantly, WHOSE we are.  

For the past two years I have chosen a "word" that I desire God to develop in my life.  At the beginning of this year I chose the word "secure."  Let me tell you why:  Insecurity is defined as "a lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt."  It is also defined as "not adequately protected; i.e. an insecure fortress."  Contrast that with author and speaker Beth Moore's definition of being secure:  "the real mark of security is the ability to be around anyone, regardless of how attractive or intelligent (or in man terms: successful, manly, in shape, popular, athletic, etc) and still maintain personal confidence and contentment."  The mark of real security of what I'm shooting for this year.  I've been asking God to work in me and to continue to develop that in me.  It's certainly a process with steps forward and steps backward, but today, God revealed to me another step in the right direction:  "I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made."  I would invite you to do the same.

1 comment:

  1. I can really relate to all you have written Rich, thanks for the insight.


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