Friday, October 21, 2011

Axis Wrap Up - Modesty

Continued our Guys and Girls series at axis Wednesday with a talk on modesty.  I really tried to talk specifically to our girls about how a guy thinks (which can be scary) and also challenge our guys to guard our thoughts and honor the women around us.  It was a really good night that seemed to keep the interest of both the girls and the guys.  I tried to speak tastefully yet candidly about the topic.

I tried to explain the difference between how a guy and girl think when they see something.  What a girl may think of as "cute," a guy will often think of as "hot" and there-in lies one of the main differences between guys and girls.  Guys are very visual and I tried to explain that any outfit that a girl may wear that calls attention to the most private areas of the female body because it's too tight, too short, or too revealing, will automatically be an "eye magnet" for the guys and will often cause a guy to fantasize about her sexually.  Yes, guys are just naturally visual, but this is not an excuse to lust or to fantasize.  I tried to explain to our girls that there are still many guys out there trying to battle this every day and keep their thoughts pure, but also let them know there are many guys who do not.

I focused on two main things during the night:  1) The reason why many dress immodestly.  I really believe its an issue of self respect.  I tried to explain to girls that how they dress on the outside is often a sign of how they may feel  on the inside.  Skin tight, revealing clothes are often a sign that a girl feels very insecure and only feels like she has her body to offer to others.  I desperately tried to explain that dignity and self respect and confidence all come when a girl begins to understand what it means to be a daughter of God.  True beauty flows from a confidence that you are a daughter of the King of the Universe.  2) How to dress to be pure and not to lure.  I didn't want to go all "legalistic" on our girls and say they can't wear this or that or whatever it may be.  I offered two Bible verses for them:  1 Corinthians 6:19 - 20 and Philippians 2:4 which talk of honoring God with our bodies and looking out for the interests of others.  We can dress in such a way to honor God and also serve.  I offered some guidelines for dressing modestly which you can find right here.

It wasn't the easiest talk I've ever done but I'm glad to have had the opportunity to do it.  I care so much for the girls in our youth ministry and truly desire the best for them.  I know that many girls simply do not understand the mind of a guy and the importance of modesty.  It was a great night with some great discussion in our Chat Groups too.

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