Topic: Lies about sex
Fun Stuff: We did another Minute to Win It game called "Hanky Panky" ... appropriate for the night's topic.
Attendance: 157 with 6 first time visitors
Bible Verses: Genesis 2:24, 1 Corinthians 6:18
Main Thought: The sexual relationship is one of the most powerful forces in our lives.
Night Review: We wrapped up our Lies, Lies, Lies series by looking at 3 specific lies we often hear about sex. I tried my best to talk about these things using a good combination of humor and seriousness. The 3 lies we looked at were:
1) God Wants to Take the Fun Out of Sex ... TRUTH - God created sex. He told Adam and Eve to go have sex (Adam said, "Woo Hoo!") God has an entire book of the Bible that just talks about sex (Song of Solomon ... I've never seen our kids try to find a book of the Bible so quickly). Many people think that because God sets up "boundaries" for sex (reserve sex for marriage) that He is trying to take the fun out of it. We talked about how untrue that is. We talked through the idea of how boundaries are a good thing ... it keeps us all on the same page ... we know what to expect (i.e. rules of a game). When people break the rules, there are consequences and a game with no rules or boundaries is simply chaos. When everyone plays by their OWN rules, chaos and confusion happens. Rules and boundaries of games are set up to help us know how to win. God's boundaries are there to help us understand how to win at sex ... how to get the most out of sex. And, God says wait for marriage.
2) Sex is Purely Physical ... TRUTH - We are sexual beings. Having sex will affect every aspect of who we are ... physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. God designed sex to be a life-long covenant between two people. "Dating is about honor. Love is about self-sacrifice. Sex is about lifelong covenant" (Steve Argue). We looked at 1 Corinthians 6:18 and how it describes sexual sin by saying "No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality (any form of sex or sexual arousal outside of God's boundaries) is a sin against your own body." I spent time really talking to our girls here. Girls are wired in such as way that makes them more vulnerable sexually. Girls will often open themselves up to a guy physically because they are longing for the intimacy that only a sexual relationship will bring. Guys can disconnect emotionally from a relationship. Girls cannot. I wasn't trying to make guys out to be the "bad guys" but simply trying to show that the emotional consequences for a girl having sex outside of marriage can far outlast even a guy's ability to remember the relationship.
3) If You Are In Love, It's OK ... TRUTH - We have to be careful when we follow our heart. The Bible describes our hearts as "... the most decietful of all things, desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?" (Jeremiah 17:9) Basically that means, when it comes to matters of the heart ... don't follow your heart! And, that statement comes from someone who is a big time "feeler!" It's better to follow the guidelines of the Bible. Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path." Psalm 119:133 says, "Guide my steps by Your word so I will not be overcome by evil." The goal is to have the desires of our heart line up with the guidelines of God's word. That's a winning combination!
I talked to our kids about why I chose to wait until marriage. I don't know when or where it was, but somewhere along the line I just realized the sexual relationship we have with someone is one of the most powerful forces in our lives. I wanted to protect that. If we believe the devil's lies about sex, sex has the power to tear us down, bring nothing but hurt, guilt and pain, and then leave us confused. He wants to create confusion, guilt, and baggage ... it's just what he does.
I talked to our kids about the forgiveness and freedom available through Jesus if they have already had sex. I also challenged our kids to set up boundaries to stay pure.
Overall, a positive night. I really tried to help our kids see that what they may learn about sex from the media or movies or the internet doesn't come from people who really care about them. It comes from people who simply care about making money so they will depict sex in a way that makes the most money for them. What they will hear at axis about sex comes from someone who genuinely cares for them and wants the best for them.
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